Why I think the big things are actually the little things

When I look back on my life so far, it’s funny how little the “big” moments seem to matter. At 17, I graduated from college with my first degree—a milestone most people would call a major achievement. And don’t get me wrong, it was. But honestly, the moment didn’t feel as monumental as I expected. I got my diploma, smiled for the photos, and that was that.

The same thing happened with my high school prom. You’d think it would be this magical night, but for me, it was just… awkward and underwhelming. I even took on the responsibility of planning the whole thing. I had envisioned it being this amazing event—beautiful decorations, a fun atmosphere, and a night of unforgettable memories. But when the big night came, it just didn’t live up to the hype. It left me feeling like I had overthought everything for nothing.

But the moments I treasure most? They’re not the ones that come with caps and gowns or formalwear and corsages. They’re the little, unassuming moments—the kind that often slip by unnoticed unless you’re paying attention.

The Small Moments That Shape Us

I remember a random Tuesday when I was feeling overwhelmed with anxiety about the future. My partner noticed, made me something to eat, and held me. That small gesture meant more than any graduation ceremony ever could. It reminded me that I’m not alone, even when everything feels heavy.

Then there’s my favorite kind of morning—when the house is still quiet, the sun filters in just right, and I can hear the birds outside. Those mornings feel like permission to breathe and take things slow, even if the rest of the day is chaotic.

I think about moments that caught me off guard in the best way, like when a stranger once complimented my outfit at a coffee shop. It wasn’t a big deal, but it made me feel seen. Or the time my coworker, who I didn’t know at all, told me out of the blue “You matter.” That one stuck with me longer than I’d expected.

And, of course, there are the shared moments that mean everything. Late-night conversations with my partner where we jump from laughing hysterically to spilling our deepest fears. Random text messages from friends that say, “Hey, I’m proud of you.”

What I’ve realized is that it’s rarely the big, planned events that leave a lasting impression. It’s the quiet, unexpected moments of connection, comfort, or clarity that shape who we are.

Why the Little Things Matter

Graduating college at 17 taught me a lot about setting goals and achieving them, but it also taught me something else: the moments leading up to the big event are where the real magic happens. It’s the long nights I spent studying while I was taking 21 hours a semester, the professors who made me laugh when I was stressed, and the tiny victories like finally understanding a tough concept. Those are the things that stick with me.

And as for prom? Sure, the night itself was a flop, but the process of planning the event—the choices I made for the decorations, the budget, the theme—taught me a lot about organization, creativity, and collaboration, which ended up being more rewarding than the prom itself.

The little things matter because they’re what make up most of our lives. The big events are rare and fleeting, but small moments happen every single day. They’re where real life unfolds, where we build connections, and where we find joy in unexpected places.

How to Start Noticing the Little Things

If you’re like me, it’s easy to get caught up chasing the “next big thing.” But slowing down to appreciate the little things has brought me more happiness than I ever expected. Here are some ways I’ve learned to savor those small moments:

1. Practice Gratitude: At the end of each day, I think about one small thing that made me smile. It could be as simple as the sound of rain or a funny meme I saw online.

   
   

2. Be Present: When I feel overwhelmed, I take a moment to pause and notice what’s happening around me—the colors, the sounds, the textures. It helps ground me in the moment.

   
   

3. Celebrate Small Wins: Got through a tough assignment? Finished a long day? Treat yourself, even if it’s just with a few minutes of relaxation or a favorite snack.

Closing Thoughts

I’m starting to realize that life isn’t made up of milestones—it’s made up of moments. The small, everyday joys might not make it into the highlight reel, but they’re what give life its color and meaning.

So today, I challenge you to pause and notice the little things. What’s one small moment that brought you joy? I promise, if you look for them, you’ll start to see how the little things are actually the big things.